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Does this sound familiar? “I think I feel ____.” We can’t think how we feel. This is impossible. There are facts and there are feelings. Until I learned this, I was really good at thinking how I felt or so I thought.
grew denser – I lost connectedness with my essence – my energy and focus went to keeping that shell in tact between me and others. I wouldn’t let anyone get close. The shell acted as my shield to survive. I remember a friend who reads palms shared that my head and my heart weren’t connected and I’d disagree. I knew I was sensitive and had feelings. Pushed buttons are a direct link to unfinished issues. We can rationalize and attempt to fix a situation with talking about i and it tmay diffuse a bit however that pain continues to influence our choices and decisions. Last week's Pondering's I wrote about what you don’t own owns you. Here’s an example of this thinking/feeling concept in action: Recently I recognized that I had a HOT button around chronic TV watching. Ok, so here’s where my head / intellect kicked in: I can rationalize my children’s father and with my dad watched a lot of TV, thus I felt ignored. I can also add that I’m very active and prefer doing things rather than sitting for hours being a TV expert. While all of this has merit, I continued to feel emotionally charged. With further exploring the source of my discontent, I realized it provokes me to see someone sitting while I’m obsessed with working and if I dare take time off, I’d consider myself to be lazy and if I did, I’d prove my mother right – anyone who sits on their hinny and watches hours of TV is worthless. Oh boy, the feelings appeared and I purged. This was a bingo.
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Ponderings...
A Pushed Button
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